AMITY (AP) - In just three seasons, the Amity White Sharks have gone from the best record in the Weaver League (after 116 win jaunt in 2012) to the worst record, having won just 9 games all season for a putrid .128 winning percentage. This kind of plummet is pretty impressive, even when you don’t consider the peripheral numbers. Currently, the club is at the bottom of the Inferno League in both runs scored and runs allowed. They’ve been out-homered 113-58 and stolen just 11 bases. Fans are so scarce in Sea World Park that you’d think we were in Euro Disney. But despite all this, team management stressed their hope for the future at a recent press conference, set up before a 5-4 loss to ex-rivals Honolulu, and they seem to feel that success may again be peaking over the horizon in the form of a white shark-fin.

“We choose this day because we feel we are at another turning point with our ball club.” said GM Max R in his opening statement, “We are now in our darkest valley, and, although the climb back to the top will be a tough one, we are proud to say that we have set our selves up for vast improvement in the next few years, and we believe that climb has now begun.”

After 9 straight division titles dating back to 2004, the White Sharks were forced to catalyze a rebuild in 2013. Opting for a massive fire sale rather than letting the team fade over a period of many seasons, such Amity greats as CF Johnny Damon, P Andy Pettite and 3B Saduhura Oh, among many others, were dealt for prospects and picks. This has transformed the club’s previously barren farm system into one of the richest in all of baseball, but simultaneously dropped the Weaver League franchise into the cellar of all cellars.

“We brought in a franchise player this year who is already, at 25, one of the most explosive hitters in the league.” Max continued, referring to RF Chuck Klien who is currently among the IL leaders in most slugging categories, “When we get a real lineup around him, he should be capable of setting some serious records. We also have begun to reach the point where a few of our prospects are hitting the water. P Albert Flynn, for instance, will make his 2nd major league start this afternoon.”

Flynn took the loss that day, as he went 8 innings allowing five runs against HON to run his record to 0-2. Nothing to brag about, really, but then Flynn is only on the roster because the Amity minor leagues are overflowing with talent. After the ammi draft, there was simply nowhere for Albert to go but up to the show along with 1B Doyle Lopez. Both of the kids are probably not quite ready to be ROYs, but they have shown some grit so far and still have a long development window ahead of them. Much more interesting, however, are the dozens of Amity prospects that are still below the surface; arms like Joe Herman, Mario Smith, Mike Renteria, Arturo Diego and Milo Lockwood, and players like SS Willie Campbell and LF Harry Woodling. These are the names that will one-day strike new fear into the Polanski Division.

That future is a ways off, however. In the meantime, all that GM Max R could really offer up to the Amity fans was the new logo and a promise of a new stadium in 2016... 200 miles away! According to information released at the conference, the Sharks will move their center of operations from Long Island to Boston, MA next year and take over the old Boston Fartknockers soccer stadium. Fartknocker Park has been under renovations to refit for the White Sharks for two years now since the soccer team moved to Tulsa, and should be ready for opening day of next season. Rumor has it that the project took so long because the blueprints were altered significantly after Chuck Klien signed with Amity. One can only imagine that right-field will be highly intimate at the new Amity park.