PORTLAND (AP) - With the Portland Scalpers now coming together as a team and playing somewhat well, the team has announced that they will be moving from the US to Argentina in the near future. Robert Wyatt was at the groundbreaking for the new stadium, but there weren't any other members of the management in attendance. Over the All-Star break, all the Scalpers were free to do what they wished, but some were asked to go to the groundbreaking as a PR move. Among the players that went were the first three hitters in the Scalpers lineup, Carlos Guillen, Duane Singleton, and even though he is currently hampered by a bad back, Richard Hidalgo. Also present was 25 year old pitcher Jose Pett, to promote the youth movement to the crowd. However, the manager of the Scalpers, Chef was vehement about not going. Chef was reported as telling Wyatt in a closed door meeting that going to Argentina was the wrong move, and he wouldn't be going with the team when they moved. This sparked an argument between the two in which both accused the other of not taking the team seriously. When Wyatt complained that Chef had not done his best to encourage the young guys as he is famed for, Chef told Wyatt, "Fudge you, I've been developing these guys, and when they do well you trade them. You've done nothing but make my job harder, and I am going back to South Park to serve food to the childrens."

Wyatt has not yet found a permanent replacement, but as of now he will be taking over on an interim basis. When Wyatt informed the players who accompanied him on the trip of this, the mood was quite sober. "The trip took quite a turn at that point, we were all shocked," said Hidalgo. "We have all been having fun with Chef as our manager. He is a great guy to be associated with, and he always made getting women on our road trips easier." Singleton, the elder of the group had this to say, "Chef was one of those guys who is a players manager, and we may miss that, but if Mr. Wyatt is serious about building a contender, he should learn from being in the dugout well."

With the reports then making the rounds in the media, the questions at the groundbreaking started. "Do you intend to manage the team throughout the season?" asked one reporter. "We are in talks with a lot of people right now, but I don't intend to bring in any outsiders in the middle of the season. I do not intend to manage this team in the 2005 season, and my prediction of winning the 2007 Inferno League championship stands." "So, you aren't considering anyone in your organization for the position?" asked another reporter. "At this point, we are very happy with the people in our organization, and we will not shuffle them around."

Many believe that current pitching coach and former Diablo Sid Fernandez should get the job. When asked about bringing him up to manage the Scalpers, Wyatt had this to say, "Sid has made a lot of progress in working with our young pitchers, but I think his talents wouldn't translate to the hitters, and I'm looking at bringing in someone who can motivate all of our players." At this point in time, the team has been in contact with a few people inside and outside of baseball. "We have been in talks with a few people who have good heads for the game. Right now, I am interviewing one of my former players from my former team the Diablos, Mr. Don Mattingly. He brings a lot to the table." Also, among the candidates are another former Diablo Tony Fernandez, former Hogg Andre Dawson, and former Galaxian Julio Franco. "Some people outside of baseball are being considered, but we will not be revealing who they are to protect the negotiations."

Either way the Scalpers go, the future looks bright. With no where to go but up, next season promises to be intriguing. The Scalpers will be debuting a pretty new bullpen with three new faces from AAA, and adding a new starter from AAA in Rufe Rollins. "In Rufe, we have a guy who should be in the upper tier of pitchers in 2 or 3 seasons. He brings such raw talent to the table, and we believe he will be competing with the regular pitchers (non all timers) for the pitching crown." But, before the Scalpers look too far ahead, they will have a shot at finishing .500 or better for the first time since trading away all of heir established talent. "We are optimistic that we can finish at .500 this season, however if a deal for either Rick Heiserman or Pete Uhl, both of whom have been pitching better and better this season, presents itself, we may move them." Pett was the only one to have a comment on the dealing of the pitching staff in the past few seasons, "It has definitely given me and some of the young guys opportunities that we wouldn't have had yet, but it may have pushed us a little too quickly into he pressure cooker that is the majors. We are all still a little young, but we are coming into our own. We will make a lot of noise in the upcoming season and for years to come."