BORA BORA (AP): "I'd like to introduce, THE NASTIEST BOYSSSS!", proclaimed Jeff Spicoli at the Bora Bora Surfriders press conference introducing the two new relievers added to the bullpen. At the inter-conference trading deadline, Bora Bora traded away some youth to acquire Terry Adams from Rio de Janerio and John Wetteland from Cairo. Spicoli soon passed the mike to GM Sean Uezu and mumbed something about a summer swell...

"The Weaver League has the best competition in the world--so if you want to get ahead you have to get creative. We got a little older, but I think we got a whole lot wiser and made our already solid pitching staff that much better. Adding John [Wetteland] and Terry [Adams] to Tony [Osuna] and Nelly [Rob Nelson] will make our team very dangerous with any lead going into the 7th inning." When asked about the future, Uezu commented, "Granted, Wetteland is in the twilight of his career--but he can still bring the gas. And Terry is just the man! He [Adams] is probably one of the most dominating closers in the game--not to mention that he still has a good number of years in front of him. I'm sad to trade away those picks and Bobby [Johnson] has a bright future... but you gotta make sacrifices if you want to in."

When asked about coming all the way over to Bora Bora, Wettland stated, "I was tired of looking up the standings and seeing those damned Surfriders ahead of us. I now have that opportunity to win that ring. I've done everything that one can do--except experience the playoffs and try to win that Weaver Championship. I'd like to thank Jay [Cairo owner Jason Frier] for honoring my request and giving me the chance to go out a winner!"

"It's weird wearing the white with blue pin-stripes after hating them for so long.", said Terry Adams. "Everyone has been really cool so far. But that darn Nobs [Ryu Nobeka] gave me some rubs for last year 4-1 beating we took last season. It was all in fun. I think I'm going to really enjoy playing for this fine organization."

Before closing, Peter Gammons asked, "Who is going be the closer? Aren't there a lot of egos that might get brused with so much talent?"

Terry Adams grabbed the mike and said, "I don't know 'bout the others, but I'm just here to shut people down. Don't try to stir up any trouble Pete! I don't care where I pitch. If everyone does their job and it'll all work out at the end. Saves mean nothing to me. It's the amount of trophies you win at the end of every year is the only stat I care about!"